All posts by Colorado Springs Mediation

I Got Divorced At 37 And Never Expected What Came Next

Most people aren’t thinking about a divorce at the age of 37, but one woman shares her story of what it is like to go through a divorce at this age. But, she has far more to tell in her story. Her story has those unexpected turns but a happy ending when the day is done. From getting fired to perhaps a midlife crisis, this is what happens after you spend 12 years of your life with someone.

Key Takeaways:

  • Divorce at 37 can be the perfect timing to still have a new fulfilling life as long as you meet the right person shortly after.
  • After a divorce it’s good to get away for a bit to clear your mind but it doesn’t mean you have to completely change your life.
  • The author was still able to have children and a family even though they had already spent 12 years of their life in another marriage.

“After twelve years of what began as a romantic adventure but had started to feel like a Tom and Jerry cartoon, I thought perhaps I was too selfish to be a good partner.”

Read more: https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/i-got-divorced-at-37-and-never-expected-what-came-next_us_55d2179ce4b07addcb4389da?section=us_divorce

6 Signs You’re In A Band-Aid Relationship (And What To Do About It)

If you are not happy or sad in your relationship, but simply okay with where you are at for the time, you are in a Band- Aid relationship and it is time to get out of the situation before thins take a turn for the worse. There are a number of signs that indicate this is the type of relationship that you are involved in, from stopping trying to fix things in the relationship and comparing your relationship to others.

Read more: 6 Signs You’re In A Band-Aid Relationship (And What To Do About It)

Three Relationship Compromises You Should Never Make

There are 3 relationship compromises that you should never make. These bad signs are something that you really need to pay attention to. All long term relationships involve compromises between people. There are many negotiations that you need to make when you are in a relationship. You need to listen to the other partner and make them happy. But, one compromise you should never make is hiding who you are inside. Another thing is tolerating disrespect.

Key Takeaways:

  • Don’t hide any characteristics of yourself from your partner and take the time to talk with your partner about things that are important to you.
  • Develop a mutual respect and understanding of one another’s feelings during the argument.
  • Try to remain open sexually and discuss with your partner what your desires are in the bedroom so they are able to successfully fulfill your intimate needs .

“Being able to negotiate and find compromise is often a sign of a healthy relationship.”

Read more: https://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/the-squeaky-wheel/201709/3-relationship-compromises-you-should-never-make

The Words That Ended My Marriage

When it is time for a couple to end the marriage, it is usually evident to them both and it seems the most trivial of things cause the final straw and the ultimate dismissal of the relationship. Here, you can share in some of the things that broke other relationship up and see where your factors rank up. Maybe you will learn something new or learn that you share the same break-up causes as someone else.

Read more: The Words That Ended My Marriage

Sex Therapists Explain The Real Reason People Watch Porn On Twitter

Twitter lets you express yourself in 150 characters or less and also watch videos, share photos, and more. Many people even use it for porn, as we learned recently after an ‘accidental’ like by the one and only Ted Cruz that landed on a porn video. It caused quite the uproar as you would imagine, and left people speculating as to why Twitter, of all places, would be there go-to porn hub. Sex therapists now have the answer to that daunting question, revealed for you here.

Key Takeaways:

  • Sex therapist, Janet Brito, notes that unexpected platforms, like Twitter and Instagram, can be sites used for porn access.
  • Brito goes on to acknowledge that the non-Pornhub route of accessing titillating matter is not unusual with couples where porn has been a problem in the past.
  • She also cautions that incognito modes and apps that promise anonymity should be taken with a grain of salt, as nothing online is really private.

“Hiding porn ― or keeping any sexual proclivity a secret ― ultimately shortchanges both people in the relationship, said Chris Kingman, a New York City therapist who specializes in porn addiction.”

Read more: http://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/why-people-watch-porn-on-twitter_us_59b9500fe4b0edff97187370?section=us_divorce

7 Signs Your Spouse Might Be Having An Emotional Affair

Sometimes an affair occurs when there is no kissing or sexual contact whatsoever. It is known as an emotional affair and they are more common than you might realize. And, as expected, there are more women who are involved in these affairs, although there are also men who participate. If you are wondering if your spouse might be involved in such a relationship, many signs point in that direction and it is important that you know all seven of them.

Read more: 7 Signs Your Spouse Might Be Having An Emotional Affair

14 Questions to Ask About the Quality of Your Relationship

Psychologist at northwestern university say that there are fourteen different basic principles in relationships. They are also broken down into four different categories. The Fourteen different principles are principles such as uniqueness, integration,trajectory and responsiveness. Each of the fourteen play a important part such as the maintenance principle. If you want to keep the relationship going then there will be times that both partners will have to work stuff out and get through the tough stuff. The Fourteen principles have to be in place for the relationship to work.

Key Takeaways:

  • A new proposal posits that there are, specifically, 14 underlying principals beneath all of psychology’s relationship theories.
  • The bold supposition is the brainchild of Northwestern University’s Professor, Eli Finkel and colleagues.
  • Finkel and colleagues have filtered the 14 principals into 4 question categories that deal with specific relationship arenas.

“However, if your relationship is gratifying in general, you’ll be willing to adapt your standards to meet your partner’s reality.”

Read more: https://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/fulfillment-any-age/201709/14-questions-ask-about-the-quality-your-relationship

These 7 Foods Are Considered Aphrodisiacs, But Do They Work?

Can certain foods really make you want to have sex after you eat them? There are many foods out there that people swear by when they want to improve their sexual energy, such as the seven listed here. But, do they really work like so many claim or is it all just a bunch of hype to get people excited? Worry no more because the truth of the matter is revealed here for you and these details you do not want to miss.

Key Takeaways:

  • Considered to cause arousal, or desire, aphrodisiacs are named after the goddess of Aphrodite.
  • These edible items often have positive, nutritive effects on human, sexual organs, besides creating energy and elevating body temperature and heart rate.
  • One aphrodisiac, watermelon, dilates and relaxes blood vessels, in the manner of erectile dysfunction drugs, by virtue of an amino acid.

“Chocolate is our go-to Valentine’s Day gift for good reason: it’s delicious, decadent and you’d be hard pressed to find a person who doesn’t like some type of it.”

Read more: http://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/the-truth-about-7-foods-that-claim-to-be-aphrodisiacs_us_59bc090ce4b086432b06cc97?section=us_divorce

5 Ways To Make Small Gestures Count In Your Marriage

In order to stay married, and in love with your partner, it is up to each of you to do the small stuff that matters for one another. But, you must ensure that those small things count, like they should, rather than go unrecognized. Here, you can learn five simple ways to ensure the little things that you are doing to keep the love alive do not go unnoticed by the person that you love. These tips work!

Key Takeaways:

  • Studies bolster a consensus that it’s not the big gestures that keep couples going strong, but the small, important things, like cooking for your loved one.
  • The small, but important stuff, like picking up chores your loved one’s too bushed to tackle, are what writer, Eli Finkel, calls ‘lovehacks.’
  • Small, but great love hacks, include, using courtesy words, please, thank you, with your loved one, and carving out special time, even twenty minutes.

“Problems at work, financial pressures, or family drama can all push a couple apart.”

Read more: http://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/5-ways-to-make-small-gestures-count-in-your-marriage_us_59c05affe4b082fd4205b954?section=us_divorce

Lady Gaga Hints At The Heartbreaking Reason She And Taylor Kinney Split

In Lady Gaga’s new Netflix documentary “Gaga: Five Foot Two”, Gaga has no shame in talking about sensitive topics such as her somewhat recent breakup with Taylor Kinney. Being together for five years, Gaga and Kinney split in July of 2016. She thinks that possibly her career has to do with her breakups, considering her past relationships have ended when her career started to blow up at the times. Although they both have been pushing to keep the relationship going, they had to separate, although they still “really love each other”. Now, she is in a new relationship with her talent agent and claims to be in love with him, because he is there to “catch her if she falls”.

Read more: Lady Gaga Hints At The Heartbreaking Reason She And Taylor Kinney Split