Category Archives: Commentary

The Marital Fight That Never Ends

There are usually fights in a marriage at least occasionally. It doesn’t have to be that way but often is because people just don’t know how to communicate. This is why so many marriages end in divorce. You have to be willing to work on things together and many have a hard time with that. It takes compromise and work. Sometimes working on it feels like its own fight. This one is worth it, though, in most cases.

Key Takeaways:

  • The fights in a marriage may may not be so much about the various issues involved, but rather who is in control of the issues.
  • All married couples have differences, and some of them were influenced by the families they came from.
  • Honest, open dialogue is the key to resolving marital disputes.

“One of the principle reasons certain perpetual problems persist in relationships is that most people are quite good at seeing how their partner is causing problems, yet not so much themselves.”

Read more: https://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/the-two-shall-become-one/201709/the-marital-fight-never-ends

Everything You Need To Know About Starting Over After Divorce

You likely won’t find anything else more stressful than divorce, but this isn’t to say that it is not something you cannot put behind you so that you can move on and get a new life going. But, there’s many things to remember if you want to move on and start over after you have divorced. The truth about divorce and starting over is shocking to some, but nonetheless important to know if you want to do things the right way.

Key Takeaways:

  • Divorce is long and incredibly stressful even for strong people.
  • The process is an emotional roller coaster but you just have to ride it through to the end.
  • Eventually you will feel better, create new memories, and see the opportunities provided by it.

“You have to close your heart to memories with your ex and look forward to creating new ones with your family.”

Read more: https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/start-over-after-divorce_us_59bfdb84e4b0edff971dd05d?section=us_divorce

3 Relationship Compromises You Should Never Make

Relationships are an ongoing effort, and as such, require compromise. Even so, a healthy relationship has a few key items on which you should never compromise: You should always be honest about who you are, including beliefs, traits, goals, dreams, and even flaws. You should provide and expect respect from your partner — disrespect shows a lack of empathy, and will introduce weaknesses into your relationship. Thirdly, be open and clear about your sexual needs, desires, and even history. Sexual compatibility is important, and can only be achieved when all partners communicate.

Key Takeaways:

  • Some couples may be tempted to make compromises between one another. But experts argue that a relationship compromise is not the move that they want to make either.
  • Negotiating is a sure sign of a healthy relationship between people. Pay attention to bad signs that can affect the relationship between two people.
  • Follow some guidelines for how a relationship compromise needs to happen for people. The young couple may or may not be ready to make these changes over time.

“Being able to negotiate and find compromise is often a sign of a healthy relationship.”

Read more: https://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/the-squeaky-wheel/201709/3-relationship-compromises-you-should-never-make

7 Deeply Troubling Lessons I Learned From Being ‘The Other Woman’

When you are the other woman after an affair there are many lessons that you learn, whether or not you really want to learn them. And, those lessons are oftentimes painful and those who’ve been cheated on feel them intensely inside their hearts. You learn that being a mistress isn’t glamourous, and you learn that sometimes you do things that even surprise you. ANd, there’s so much more you will find that you learn after this situation.

Key Takeaways:

  • The mistress is a real person too with real feelings and they typically never have dreams of becoming a mistress it just happens
  • The author was able to find peace with herself and forgiveness from the wife but it still took a long time for her to heal from he guilt and pain.
  • It’s good to find out what your pain and pleasure ratio is in all aspects of life so that you know your limits

“Forgive yourself for not being perfect. Nobody is. You had to learn this lesson, now it may be time to move on and live your life.”

Read more: https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/7-deeply-troubling-lessons-i-learned-from-being-the_us_59a5d922e4b08299d89d0a89?section=us_divorce

The Moment I Knew My Marriage Was Over

Many people knew the moment that their marriage was over. People were asked about the moment when they knew their relationship was over with their loved one. One lady was told she could not go to school once they had kids and she did not like that, so they ended up getting a divorce. Another person broke their foot and their loved one would not take them to the hospital because they were too tired.

Key Takeaways:

  • Infidelity, selfishness, disrespect and not feeling cared for are all common examples of how to end a relationship or marriage.
  • There is a moment when one just knows that the person they are with may not be the one they are supposed to spend their life with.
  • Relationships can end for a multitude of reasons. Just depends on the people and the things they value.

“We asked readers on Facebook and Twitter to share the moment they knew their relationships were over (hashtag: #themomentiknew) and collected the responses below.”

Read more: https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/the-moment-these-men-and-women-knew-their-marriages-were-over_us_57b772fbe4b03d51368885b7?section=us_divorce

I Got Divorced At 37 And Never Expected What Came Next

Most people aren’t thinking about a divorce at the age of 37, but one woman shares her story of what it is like to go through a divorce at this age. But, she has far more to tell in her story. Her story has those unexpected turns but a happy ending when the day is done. From getting fired to perhaps a midlife crisis, this is what happens after you spend 12 years of your life with someone.

Key Takeaways:

  • Divorce at 37 can be the perfect timing to still have a new fulfilling life as long as you meet the right person shortly after.
  • After a divorce it’s good to get away for a bit to clear your mind but it doesn’t mean you have to completely change your life.
  • The author was still able to have children and a family even though they had already spent 12 years of their life in another marriage.

“After twelve years of what began as a romantic adventure but had started to feel like a Tom and Jerry cartoon, I thought perhaps I was too selfish to be a good partner.”

Read more: https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/i-got-divorced-at-37-and-never-expected-what-came-next_us_55d2179ce4b07addcb4389da?section=us_divorce

Three Relationship Compromises You Should Never Make

There are 3 relationship compromises that you should never make. These bad signs are something that you really need to pay attention to. All long term relationships involve compromises between people. There are many negotiations that you need to make when you are in a relationship. You need to listen to the other partner and make them happy. But, one compromise you should never make is hiding who you are inside. Another thing is tolerating disrespect.

Key Takeaways:

  • Don’t hide any characteristics of yourself from your partner and take the time to talk with your partner about things that are important to you.
  • Develop a mutual respect and understanding of one another’s feelings during the argument.
  • Try to remain open sexually and discuss with your partner what your desires are in the bedroom so they are able to successfully fulfill your intimate needs .

“Being able to negotiate and find compromise is often a sign of a healthy relationship.”

Read more: https://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/the-squeaky-wheel/201709/3-relationship-compromises-you-should-never-make

Sex Therapists Explain The Real Reason People Watch Porn On Twitter

Twitter lets you express yourself in 150 characters or less and also watch videos, share photos, and more. Many people even use it for porn, as we learned recently after an ‘accidental’ like by the one and only Ted Cruz that landed on a porn video. It caused quite the uproar as you would imagine, and left people speculating as to why Twitter, of all places, would be there go-to porn hub. Sex therapists now have the answer to that daunting question, revealed for you here.

Key Takeaways:

  • Sex therapist, Janet Brito, notes that unexpected platforms, like Twitter and Instagram, can be sites used for porn access.
  • Brito goes on to acknowledge that the non-Pornhub route of accessing titillating matter is not unusual with couples where porn has been a problem in the past.
  • She also cautions that incognito modes and apps that promise anonymity should be taken with a grain of salt, as nothing online is really private.

“Hiding porn ― or keeping any sexual proclivity a secret ― ultimately shortchanges both people in the relationship, said Chris Kingman, a New York City therapist who specializes in porn addiction.”

Read more: http://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/why-people-watch-porn-on-twitter_us_59b9500fe4b0edff97187370?section=us_divorce

14 Questions to Ask About the Quality of Your Relationship

Psychologist at northwestern university say that there are fourteen different basic principles in relationships. They are also broken down into four different categories. The Fourteen different principles are principles such as uniqueness, integration,trajectory and responsiveness. Each of the fourteen play a important part such as the maintenance principle. If you want to keep the relationship going then there will be times that both partners will have to work stuff out and get through the tough stuff. The Fourteen principles have to be in place for the relationship to work.

Key Takeaways:

  • A new proposal posits that there are, specifically, 14 underlying principals beneath all of psychology’s relationship theories.
  • The bold supposition is the brainchild of Northwestern University’s Professor, Eli Finkel and colleagues.
  • Finkel and colleagues have filtered the 14 principals into 4 question categories that deal with specific relationship arenas.

“However, if your relationship is gratifying in general, you’ll be willing to adapt your standards to meet your partner’s reality.”

Read more: https://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/fulfillment-any-age/201709/14-questions-ask-about-the-quality-your-relationship

These 7 Foods Are Considered Aphrodisiacs, But Do They Work?

Can certain foods really make you want to have sex after you eat them? There are many foods out there that people swear by when they want to improve their sexual energy, such as the seven listed here. But, do they really work like so many claim or is it all just a bunch of hype to get people excited? Worry no more because the truth of the matter is revealed here for you and these details you do not want to miss.

Key Takeaways:

  • Considered to cause arousal, or desire, aphrodisiacs are named after the goddess of Aphrodite.
  • These edible items often have positive, nutritive effects on human, sexual organs, besides creating energy and elevating body temperature and heart rate.
  • One aphrodisiac, watermelon, dilates and relaxes blood vessels, in the manner of erectile dysfunction drugs, by virtue of an amino acid.

“Chocolate is our go-to Valentine’s Day gift for good reason: it’s delicious, decadent and you’d be hard pressed to find a person who doesn’t like some type of it.”

Read more: http://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/the-truth-about-7-foods-that-claim-to-be-aphrodisiacs_us_59bc090ce4b086432b06cc97?section=us_divorce