Category Archives: Commentary

Finding Treasure Among The Trash

The saying ‘one man’s trash is another man’s treasure’ is true up to a point but there are some things which are just pure trash, and this shows how you can tell which is and which things could actually be treasures. It can be nice to find something great when you aren’t expecting it so you might like this info.

Key Takeaways:

  • Originally when we split, we shared her time 50/50, and it was challenging making a life for myself when she was gone with dad.
  • This year has taught me though that there is always treasure among the trash. There are always moments of happiness. It’s up to us to find them.
  • Life goes in circles…cycles…nothing stays the same. And as long as I find treasure in the trash, I will be fine.

“This year has taught me though that there is always treasure among the trash.”

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/finding-treasure-among-the-trash_us_58ebabe8e4b081da6ad00630?ir=Divorce&utm_hp_ref=divorce

The Relationship Blind Spot That Could Tank Your Marriage

This gives some very good and practical relationship advice. It tells you what to look out for. If you feel your marriage is in trouble this could be why so you should know what to look for. Many things can hurt marriages. This is obvious just from looking at the high divorce rate.

Key Takeaways:

  • blind spot seemingly harmless issues that can derail a marriage if you’re not careful
  • a blind spot that can ruin everything: thinking that you can maintain prenuptial friendships without any changes after marriage ― especially friendships with members of the opposite sex.
  • “Some spouses are okay with platonic friendships of the opposite sex, and others are not,”

“Deal with that blind spot, because that can became a very real point of contention later on.”

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/the-relationship-blind-spot-that-could-tank-a-marriage_us_58d2edc6e4b0b22b0d19a403?ir=Divorce&utm_hp_ref=divorce

The 7 Most Common Mistakes People Make When They Get Divorced

quick summary of the articlehighlights how difficult divorce can be. it can be a confusing and emotional ordeal. at times hope and willingness to negotiate can ease the pain. But one can never let themselves to believe that their will be no pain. Your options into the process my take u into directions you never previously imagined. Many people believe that your lawyer is the only way to navigate this process . Though, a lawyer is a instrumental aspect to the process. lawyers primarily deal with the paperwork and legal aspect of a divorce. The emotional side of a divorce must be handled by other parties or yourself. in conclusion when getting a divorce. you must ride the wave but never give up. try to create a life as close to your life prior to the divorce.

Key Takeaways:

  • Ultimately, divorce is an overwhelming tidal wave of change that happens to you.
  • Rebuilding your life starts immediately and having a vision of what you want your life to be, during and after your divorce, will help you better navigate the divorce process.
  • Owning this process is tough. It requires you to fully be in it. And that is a lot of responsibility. Ultimately, you will regret it if you don’t.

“Too many people cling to their divorce attorney as if that were their only life raft. There are numerous other resources, though, that can also serve you during your divorce, including financial analysts, forensic specialists, therapists, and divorce coaches.”

http://www.yourtango.com/experts/laura-miolla/avoid-these-7-mistakes-caused-divorce-overwhelm

How To Love A Messy Person When You’re A Neat Freak

Is your partner messy and disorganized while you crave neatness and order? There are effective to deal with this situation without your relationship coming to an end. Read ten tips gathered by marriage therapists and people who are in the same situation for insight into how to make your relationship work when your partner is at the opposite end of the neatness spectrum.

Key Takeaways:

  • Compromise is necessary when you have a messier partner.
  • Try to contain their mess over time.
  • Give your partner their own personal space to make messy.

“De-cluttering is so trendy right now, it’s easy to think people who drop their clothes on the floor or treat furniture as filing cabinets are morally inferior to those who crave order. But before you start in with your lecture on how messiness is the root of all evil, consider this: your need to have things tidy and organized might actually be making your partner anxious.”

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/how-to-love-a-messy-person-when-youre-a-neat-freak_us_58b6fe25e4b0284854b31ea2?ir=Divorce&utm_hp_ref=divorce

Divorcing and Coparenting With the Sociopath

Divorce can be a hard road, and when there are children involved, divorce is never the end of the relationship. There is still the relationship of co-parenting. Not really a problem when both parents are responsible and sane people. Unfortunately, it only takes one parent to mess things up. Dealing with a sociopath can seem impossible, as Susan J. Elliot knows very well. She offers five ways that you can protect yourself from a sociopath when getting divorced.

Key Takeaways:

  • Divorce is hard enough without feeling re-victimized by the system you’re depending on to protect you from someone who has harmed you.
  • It’s helpful to understand the pathology because compromise is often futile and they attack in creative ways using anything they can.
  • A sociopath has “Anti-social” Personality Disorder which doesn’t mean they are withdrawn or shy but that they do not abide by decent person behavior standards set up by society.

“The five-by-five program is one that is quite popular among those who are looking to gain a high amount of strength and muscle mass.”

https://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/getting-back-out-there/201702/divorcing-and-coparenting-the-sociopath

What NOT to Do When You Discover Your Partner Is Cheating

If you discover you’re being cheated on many actions may occur to you, most of which are probably illegal or at least unwise. It’s important to keep your head no matter how bad it hurts, though, and this will help you by outlining what you should definitely not do upon the discovery.

Key Takeaways:

  • Here are 5 ways to NOT react when you discover your partner is cheating on you.
  • the chemicals associated with panic make us ache to take action, what we really need to do is take a breather.
  • Resist the impulse to figure out, analyze and scrutinize, the person your love is cheating on you with.

“The shock of discovering an affair can make you want to pull up the blankets and hide from the world.”

https://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/having-sex-wanting-intimacy/201702/what-not-do-when-you-discover-your-partner-is-cheating

Divorce – When Should Family and Friends Get Involved? – Beliefnet

Divorces can be a very stressful event to go through. There are many things that need to be taken into account when it happens. Friends and families are left on the sideline trying to figure out what went wrong. If they see that the kids are getting hurt, they have a right to get involved.

Key Takeaways:

  • In divorce, my family and friends have gotten involved. They have done their due diligence in putting family first and most importantly my children first.
  • Family and friends comprise the checks and balances in our lives and cheer for us when we shine and caution us when we falter.
  • Families get involved WHEN NECESSARY. And if a divorcing person is reaching out because they are scared for their children then they listen.

“Family and friends comprise the checks and balances in our lives and cheer for us when we shine and caution us when we falter.”

http://www.beliefnet.com/columnists/howgreatthoupart/2017/02/divorce-family-friends-get-involved.html

Gospel Songs Helped Reba McEntire After Divorce – ABC News

With religion being a big part of American lives, most people can agree faith could restore hope and strength to even the biggest names in Hollywood. This chart-topping country singer will be releasing her newest album, a product of her devastating divorce two years prior, to share her journey and level of trust in God.

Key Takeaways:

  • Country star Reba McEntire’s first-ever gospel record helped her get through a rough patch in her personal life.
  • The Country Music Hall of Fame singer is releasing “Sing it Now: Songs of Faith & Hope” on Friday, a double album of inspirational and gospel music.
  • She said the timing was right for her to focus on her faith after she and husband Narvel Blackstock announced in 2015 that they were divorcing after 26 years of marriage.

“Country star Reba McEntire’s first-ever gospel record helped her get through a rough patch in her personal life.”

http://abcnews.go.com/Entertainment/wireStory/gospel-songs-helped-reba-mcentire-divorce-45192840

Pediatricians can help children through separation and divorce – The Chronicle

Separation and divorce can be especially hard on children, who often have a lingering sense of loss after the dissolution of their parents’ relationship. This issue has not gone unnoticed by the American Academy of Pediatrics, who have recently issued guidelines to pediatricians to help children remain healthy and positive following their parents’ separation .

Key Takeaways:

  • Pediatricians can support children whose parents are going through a divorce by maintaining positive, neutral relationships with both parents, according to a new clinical report.
  • “The pediatrician can help parents understand their children’s reactions to divorce or separation,” said one of the lead authors.
  • Children’s reactions will also vary according to their temperament and their parents’ ability to focus on their needs and feelings.

“Many children show behavior changes in the first year of parent separation.”

http://www.chroniclenewspaper.com/apps/pbcs.dll/article?AID=/20170129/NEWS01/170129997/0/FUNANDGAMES04/Pediatricians-can-help-children-through-separation-and-divorce

The Emotions of Grief After A Breakup

The loss of someone close to us can quickly turn our world into an unfamiliar place. Coping with what used to be routine becomes exhausting. The simplest task may seem daunting. Grief affects us not only emotionally, but also physically. When we can understand how grief affects us, we are better equipped to deal with its grip. While we wish we never had to learn or understand these emotions, being aware of them may offer us comfort in our own times of sorrow.

Key Takeaways:

  • Sometimes when a breakup is sudden, it seems too much to deal with and the mind goes numb, shutting down and refusing to deal for a time. It could be a minute, a day, weeks or months.
  • If you are the person who did not see the breakup coming, the shock stage will probably last longer.
  • eview is a necessary part of the grief process. This can be upsetting because it may seem like you cannot stop thinking about your relationship or your ex.

“I am a certified grief counselor who has been doing this work for many years. I’m someone who believes describing grief work in “stages” is misleading. “Stages” seems to indicate that you go neatly from one to the next.”

https://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/getting-back-out-there/201701/the-emotions-grief-after-breakup