The Walkers have been married for 70 years. When asked the secret to their marital success they replied that they have only ever really had one fight, although that fight has lasted the entire 70 years! Many couples will have at least one unresolved issue that seems to be the root cause of most arguments. It is also difficult to see what you are doing wrong and may lay all of the blame on your partner. In these cases one partners efforts to fix things may actually make things worse. The key to fixing the root issue is communication.
- Many couples have that one thing they will fight about throughout the span of their relationship and can create a viscous cycle of fixing.
- Distant pursuit viscous cycle is when one person wants to spend more time with their partner than their partner wants to spend with them.
- Try to keep an open dialogue, create more time for each, try new things, and give the gift of love.
“One of the principle reasons certain perpetual problems persist in relationships is that most people are quite good at seeing how their partner is causing problems, yet not so much themselves.”