Your attachment style stems from the way you were treated by your caretakers when you were growing up. This attachment style (healthy, or unhealthy) colors how we approach many of our adult relationships. Sometimes, when we engage using a maladaptive attachment style, we can end up heartbroken or rejected. Rejection stings for so many reasons. Having perspective on our exes can help us come to terms with the fact that the relationship never would have worked, and perhaps our exes aren’t as perfect as we think they are. Sometimes when we are rejected, we worry that we’re going to be alone forever; if we approach the situation from a different perspective, we can see every breakup is an opportunity to learn.
- Sometimes the reason rejection is so traumatizing is because we are putting the person who rejected us on a pedestal.
- Try to realize that one instance of rejection is not the end of the world. Life will continue, and you will once again begin to thrive.
- You may be putting too much thought into the connection that you had with the other person. Consistent intimacy is not the same as an instant connection.
“On a primal level we know we need a healthy attachment to thrive. As a result of that knowledge dating often becomes a sorting game.”